Updated: May 16, 2021
Dear Africana Woman,
How are you Hun? I just facilitated a masterclass and to ensure my face was lit I shone a bright light in my face, aka my phone torch light. Listen that light has given me a serious migraine. I hope it goes away sooner rather than later. Ze week has been pretty good otherwise. We have been in Kabwe, which basically means fresh air, rest, connecting with nature, eating directly from the garden and all of that jazz.
We are in quarter 2 and what that means for some is an evaluation or audit of how your goals are going so far. Do you do this? Setting new goals for Q2. Making strategies that address the challenges you have faced so far and adapting to the information that you currently have. Tell you what, I did pretty well on my goals except for one area where I got a fail grade. I gave myself the goal in 3 months to go on at least one date, hahaha I’m lying I started off with 3 dates. Then as time was winding down I was like okay fine God at least one. Hahaha. So obviously we are in a no interacting situation and I am really not ready to physically meet a ton of strangers hey. Therefore, the obvious strategy was online dating. Listen it was just a debacle in more ways than one. I do not think I am rolling over that goal, because the competitor in me hates failing. To be fair, I learned a lot about myself and my standards that I am not willing to compromise.
I’ll tell you what I think is an absolute must to do though, before zooming straight into your Q2 goals. You absolutely must STOP and CELEBRATE everything that you have accomplished in Q1. So many times, especially as high achievers, we don’t stop to smell the roses and enjoy the moment. We achieve things and, in our minds, convince ourselves that it wasn’t a big deal or we say no one will care or we say we are just too busy. No friend you must celebrate. Because as you celebrate the feeling of accomplishment validates your purpose. It gives you an extra push and energy to keep going. It reminds you of the greatness in you. I know some of you are thinking damn I did not do anything major. You are thinking that because you are comparing yourself to someone else. Think of it this way, you are the only one in your race, what did you achieve babe?
Here are some examples. I have a friend who said to me, I took a hiatus from being online because I needed to work through my mental health. I’m back now. Friend I cannot tell you how proud I was of her. She may not have been crushing her business goals but she made her health a priority and now she has the clarity to swing back into her work, the quality of which will be so much better. I was like Sis you freaking rock. You prioritised you. I am so proud of you. Along the same line another friend of mine has literally spent just over a month in another country for medical care. She isn’t working or pushing her projects forward. She has taken a step back to allow her body it’s due process to heal. She’s not trying to be super woman and take on tasks that are not necessary. Nope, she has literally said, my body, this time is for you to heal. Coz I know there are some of you out there who know exactly what I mean. You are supposed to be on bed rest but you are out on the streets. Sit down gurl.
I have another friend who just won best speaker for a meeting in her Toast Master chapter. I was like Yesssssss. Do the thang gurl. Clearly I celebrate any and everything from brushing your teeth to clipping your toe nails. So long as you felt that you made a huge step forward, then Sis you must celebrate it. AND Gas yourself up. Like I don’t think African women know how to gas yourself. Well except Nigerians maybe. We want to hide behind false humility. Nah! If you don’t hype yourself why are you expecting others to do it for you? Let me show you how it is done. It ain’t about bragging. It is all about me toasting myself and commemorating this moment. Let’s go:
CHULU!!! See what you have done these three months. Remember when you had this thing that you called an idea. And now it is a whole movement of Africana Woman Visionaries. It Legit did not exist three months ago, but you have hosted 3 pop up masterclasses, 3 master mentor sessions, a virtual networking mixer, coaching 3 super dope women, 119 members, partnering with a big international company. The consistency please! Babe it started as an idea and see now. Gurl, can we talk about your dope blonde hair for a second, like ooo chile you looked fabulous, next photoshoot if you don’t know, now you know hey (singing). Then can we talk about how you were called to serve on an ED search task force and Advisory council for both your alma mater’s like what. How does that happen? Elo Madam you have reached 1000, yes 1000 streams of the Africana Woman podcast. Like 1000 times people all over the world clicked on Africana Woman podcast and was blessed with knowledge the guests shared. But let’s take it back in February you relaunched the podcast and blog. I am sooooo proud of you babe. You were only able to do that because you took control of your finances. Like you have been so disciplined in your finances, you can actually breath, you pay things on time, you have a budget, your NO game is on point like Babe. YESSSSS. And you are this close to achieving Baby Step 1. I am so proud of you. Can we talk about the caliber of women that you are connected to, like can you remember when you had no one and said I am starting again with intentionality? Look, look. It has taken a minute but look. Every day you meet phenomenal women. So proud of the video you produced about taking power of your name. So proud of the interviews you have done, that share your mess with a message of hope. So proud after 10 years you can share your attack without a shroud of shame. Baby gel, I know you were scared, but you did it anyway. Sweetheart, remember that you are an amazing mother. You are doing the best you can with what you have and you have chosen to heal, because when you heal the next generation heals. If this is what three months looks like, I cannot wait for the next three. Go out there and SHINE.
Let me breakdown a few key things that I did here:
I spoke to myself kindly. How do you speak to yourself? What words do you use on yourself?
I did not compare myself. Simple example, I am in a podcasting community, these ladies have dope successful podcasts, who have been in the game for years, and some have 100 000+ downloads. Sis for me to celebrate my 1000 downloads, I know how much work it took me to get here, the hours, the money, the editing. Friend. I am celebrating my 1000. I don’t care about other people.
Nothing is too small to be celebrated. So yes I can celebrate my blonde hair, which was the first time in 36 years I had ever had another colour apart from black.
Your turn, try it out. Before you jump onto the Q2 speed train. Take a moment this week to write down all your wins for Q1. In fact, I would love to hear some of your wins, so send me a message, drop a note in the comments. All of that jazz. I am always ready to celebrate you. If you don’t have a hype woman in your life, call me. Lol.