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Puzzles, Thunder Thighs & a Hike

Updated: May 16, 2021

Dear Africana Woman,

Heya, So for the first time ever I am going to make this love letter short and sweet. Hehehe. Me who loves words. So here’s the deal. I have a lot on my plate. I started on a rebranding journey and I didn’t realise how wide it actually spreads. It started with the podcast. I changed the cover art, then I had to change the podcast website. There are different templates for art work which then had to be changed. I updated the YouTube channel but forgot that the video intro and general aesthetic needed to change and then I realised woah the website is way behind. In addition, the socials have to be cohesive so I have been playing around with concepts. I know, I know, I am getting technical and you don’t care. Needless to say my head is full.

My son is also on holiday, so I have decided to deliberately not do too much, you know. He goes to a boarding school on the other side of the country so this month is all about connecting. His school report from Term 1 was pretty good so I promised him we would have a celebratory dinner. Now, we try to be that family that likes board games. But the truth is the games that he likes are the games that I hate and vice versa, so it’s a non starter. But what we can agree on is puzzles. So I have started collecting them. We are currently working on the smallest 1000 piece puzzle. Like you need a magnifying glass to see the details. It’s so much fun.

But I will tell you what isn’t fun. Y’all know I love silence. I do not have a TV in my flat in Lusaka. However, in a moment of possession, I let my son bring a TV from Kabwe to Lusaka. Oh Lawd. I cyant, I just cyant. There was one day I got home and I just said, ”please turn off the TV for just one hour. Just one. I need to hear my thoughts” N I went and lay in bed. Just relishing the silence.

Now guys I need you to pray for me. I booked us on a hiking trip. I know. Chulu and hiking do not mix. The one time I went on a hiking trip, I almost died. First of all, it was not advertised as a hike, they called it A LONG WALK. This was at my high school in the UK. A long walk for me is an hour yeah. Nope. This was a 10 hour walk. LIKE WHO DOES THAT!!!! and doesn’t tell the people who are walking it. Apparently, you are supposed to be talking to the fellow walkers or students and that’s where bonds begin. What rubbish? I couldn’t bloody breathe, so how was I supposed to talk to anyone. Nonsense.

But I guess you are asking why are you going on this hiking trip? …. Well my answer to that is, “I found Jesus” LOL I’m just playing, I say that to everything. I booked the hike because I think it will be a great way to make memories and challenge myself to do something new. Well, that and activities are kinda few and far between which are socially distanced and relatively safe. Like I’m not trying to go and sit in a stuffy cinema breathing recycled air. You know what I mean?

But can I just say that before you book for things make sure you do your due diligence of understanding the actual cost. And I am always a sucker for this. It is advertised at a certain price right, and I’m like cool, put it on the budget. Then the organisers start sending me a list of all the things I need to take, like wait a moment this wasn’t on the budget. Here are a couple items:

  1. Hiking boots – Chulu doesn’t own hiking boots, need to get some. K100 (Totally second hand, I ain't crazy)

  2. 3 ltr bottle of water – What? can we first talk about how I have to carry that heavy bottle and still try breathing. So I have to buy two coz I am not alone innit. K170

  3. Drive 3 hours to starting point – Wait a minute. Wait a minute. It takes me 2 hours to get to Kabwe from Lusaka. So we are basically going to another town AND the road is bad so I have to use the 4x4 aka gas guzzler. K600+

Do you see what I mean? So, I thought this trip was the advertised amount but really, it’s way more than that. It’s almost double the amount. I better not forget the toll gate fee too. Anyway, all I’m saying is pray for me babe. I looked at the people attending and it’s a bunch of chicks, which made me very concerned. Like who is going to carry me if I faint? I need to see more buff guys on this hike.

And that is why city girls should not go on hikes. Too demanding. I love nature but on a Glamping level. Gurl just pray for me and my thighs. I won’t get into what happens when thicke girls have to walk a lot. Just know there is a lot of friction, possibly some heat. Okay. I’m out. Need to get some rest. I might jump on before next Thursday just to give you an update on how it went. But for sure, if you listen to Good Morning Beautiful, (which is an inspirational message I send out every Sunday via Whatsapp) I will not be sending that out first thing in the morning. It will be more like Good Nighting Beautiful. Or you can see how it went by catching pictures on my socials @ChuluByDesign. Although, it will not be real time, coz apparently there is no signal up there. MHM. If this is your first time here, hey Sis, welcome. Do subscribe. To all of you that come back week after week to read my scandalous opinions, thank you. I appreciate you. Drop a Hi in the comments just to let me know you dropped by. Do check out the Africana Woman podcast. So many good conversations going on there. And also look into the Visionaries, if you are entrepreneurially inclined. Alright hun, remember my desire is that you love yourself flaws n all and attract the life that you truly desire.



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